File SMTH230

Directory of image this file is from
This file as a plain text file

*20
/           "THE FABULOUS FOSSIL HOAX"
/  THE HOAX OF WURZBURG FOSSILS, A FAR-REACHING PIECE OF
/FOOLERY PERPETUATED TWO HUNDRED YEARS AGO BY GERMAN
/UNIVERSITY STUDENTS, RANKS IN INGENUITY WITH THE "BALLOON
/HOAX," THE NEW YORK SUN "MOON HOAX," AND OTHER CELEBRATED
/PRACTICAL JOKES OF HISTORY.
/  THE BUTT OF THE FOSSIL JOKE WAS A SERIOUS-MINDED OLD
/PROFESSOR, JOHANN BERINGER, WHO HELD AN HONORABLE POSI-
/TION AS A DOCTOR OF PHILOSOPHY AND MEDICINE IN WURZBURG
/UNIVERSITY. THE DOCTOR, HIGHLY RESPECTED FOR HIS LEARNING
/AND STUDIOUS HABITS, WAS APPOINTED PRIVATE PHYSICIAN TO
/THE REIGNING PRINCE BISHOP OF THE OLD UNIVERSITY TOWN. HE
/WAS DISTINGUISHED AS A SCHOLAR AND WRITER IN THE FIELDS
/OF ZOOLOGY, BOTANY, AND MEDICINE.
/  OF ALL THE PROBLEMS THEN ENGAGING SCIENTIFIC MINDS,
/NONE HAD CAUSED MORE CONTENTION THAN THE ORIGIN AND MEAN-
/ING OF FOSSILS. IT WAS CLAIMED BY SOME THAT THE CREATION
/OF FOSSILS WAS DUE TO AN UNKNOWN INFLUENCE OF THE STARS.
/ANOTHER THEORY EXPLAINED FOSSILS AS THE REMAINS OF
/OCEANIC ANIMALS AND PLANTS STRANDED ON THE LAND BY THE
/FLOOD. IT WAS NOT UNTIL ABOUT 1800 THAT IT WAS DETERMINED
/THAT FOSSILS WERE RELICS OF ANIMAL AND VEGETABLE LIFE
/THAT EXISTED IN PREHISTORIC TIMES AND HAD BECOME ENTOMBED
/IN ROCK, IN FROZEN MUD, IN THE BEDS OF RIVERS, EVEN IN THE
/SOFT GUM OF CONEBEARING TREES.
/  THE SCIENCE OF PALEONTOLOGY, OR THE KNOWLEDGE OF FOS-
/SILS, ATTRACTED PROFESSOR BERINGER. HE ADVANCED AN ORIG-
/INAL THEORY THAT FOSSILS WERE MERELY A CAPRICIOUS FABRIC-
/ATION OF THE CREATOR, PLACED IN THE EARTH TO TEST HUMAN
/FAITH. HE WAS SO KEEN ABOUT THIS PET NOTION THAT SOME OF
/HIS PUPILS AT THE UNIVERSITY COULD NOT FORBEAR PLAYING A
/TRICK ON THE OLD PROFESSOR.
/  WITH THE CONNIVANCE OF SOME OF HIS OWN COLLEAGUES, THE
/STUDENTS PRANKISHLY FASHIONED "FOSSILS" OUT OF CLAY AND
/HID THEM AMONG THE ROCKS OF A HILLSIDE WHERE THEY KNEW
/BERINGER USED TO ROAM AROUND ON GEOLOGICAL EXPLORATION.
/IT WAS NOT LONG BEFORE THE VENERABLE PROFESSOR CHANCED
/UPON THE FICTITIOUS DEPOSITS DURING ONE OF HIS WALKS.
/COMPLETELY DECEIVED, OVERJOYED AT HIS DISCOVERY, BERINGER
/HURRIED BACK TO THE UNIVERSITY AND EXHIBITED THE ORGAN-
/ISMS HE HAD FOUND.
/  THE JOKERS, PERCEIVING WITH GLEE THE SUCCESS OF THEIR
/JEST, NOW WENT FURTHER AND BURIED THE MOST FANTASTIC
/FIGURES THEIR IMAGINATIONS COULD SUGGEST. NOT CONTENT
/WITH THESE THEY EVEN BURIED INSCRIPTIONS, WORKED OUT ON
/"FOSSIL" SHELLS, ONE OF THEM BEING THE NAME OF GOD
/HIMSELF, IN HEBREW!
/  PROFESSOR BERINGER"S ELATION UPON THE DISCOVERY OF
/THESE LATTER FORMS KNEW NO BOUNDS. HE WAS NOW COMPLETELY
/CONVINCED OF THE SOUNDNESS OF HIS DOCTRINE, AND MADE
/READY TO PUBLISH THE RESULTS.
/  THE SEMIRELIGIOUS FERVOR OF THE HONEST OLD SCHOLAR
/SWEPT ALL BEFORE IT. DESPITE THE ADVICE OF LEVEL-HEADED
/FRIENDS, HE HURRIED HIS PONDEROUS WORK TO COMPLETION.
/  AND NOW FOR THE STRANGEST PART OF THE STORY. THE
/JESTERS CAME FORWARD AND CONFESSED. THEY EXPOSED ALL THEY
/HAD DONE. TO THEIR CONFUSION, BERINGER REFUSED TO LISTEN.
/THE HOAXERS REITERATED THEIR STATEMENTS THAT THE WHOLE
/THING WAS A COLOSSAL JOKE. BERINGER COULD NOT BE CON-
/VINCED. HE CONCEIVED THIS AS A BASE TRICK OF HIS ADVER-
/SARIES . HE SUSPECTED THEM OF TRYING TO ROB HIM OF THE
/GLORY OF PROCLAIMING HIS DISCOVERIES AND ESTABLISHING THE
/TRUTH OF HIS THEORY. HE HURRIED INTO PRINT. HIS MAGNUM
/OPUS APPEARED!
/  THE ENTRY OF THE VOLUME INTO THE WORLD OF THE LEARNED
/LITERATURE WAS HERALDED BY A SHOUT OF LAUGHTER! THE
/AUTHOR"S NAME BECAME A BYWORD IN THE UNIVERSITIES OF
/EUROPE. SOME DECLARED HIS BOOK WAS ONLY AN ATTEMPT TO
/FOOL THE SCIENTIFIC WORLD, OTHERS SET IT DOWN AS THE
/PRODUCT OF A MIND DISEASED.
/  COPIES OF THE WEIGHTY VOLUME, PRINTED IN LATIN, BORE
/THE TITLE "THE FIGURED STONES OF WURZBURG", AND WAS
/ILLUSTRATED WITH "MARVELOUS LIKENESSES OF TWO HUNDRED
/FIGURES, OR RATHER, INSECTIFORM STONES." IT WAS PUBLISHED
/IN WURZBURG IN 1726. THE POMPOUS DEDICATION, FULL NINE
/PAGES LONG, IS TO CHRISTOPHER FRANCIS, PRINCE BISHOP OF
/WURZBURG. AFTER THE DEDICATION AND THE PREFACE, COMES THE
/BODY OF THE WORK, DESCRIPTIVE OF BERINGER"S DISCOVERY OF
/THE FOSSILS, THE MANNER OF THEIR EXHUMATION AND EXAMIN-
/ATION, THE ACCOUNT OF THE ATTEMPT OF HIS COLLEAGUES TO
/DISSUADE HIM FROM THE WORK, AND THE DESCRIPTION AND
/SIGNIFICANCE OF THE "FOSSILS" THEMSELVES. AT THE END OF
/THE VOLUME ARE PLATES...
/  FOR A TIME THERE WAS QUESTION IN SOME PARTS OF THE
/SCHOLASTIC WORLD AS TO WHETHER OR NOT BERINGER"S BOOK WAS
/OF VALUE, A CONDITION WHICH SPURRED THE DECEIVED SCIENT-
/IST TO GREATER EFFORTS IN HIS OWN DEFENSE.
/  BUT, AS THE TRUTH BECAME GENERALLY ESTABLISHED,
/BERINGER HIMSELF WAS FINALLY UNDECEIVED. THE BLOW STAG-
/GERRED HIM; HE WAS OVERWHELMED.
/  FROM THE PINNACLE OF DICTATORSHIP, WHICH HE HAD FORMER-
/LY OCCUPIED SO SECURELY, HE BEHELD HIMSELF TUMBLED
/HEADLONG, ALMOST IN A NIGHT.
/  IN A FRENZY, HE ATTEMPTED TO BUY UP ALL COPIES OF HIS
/BOOK THAT HAD BEEN ISSUED. HIS MOST ASSIDUOUS EFFORTS
/WERE FUTILE, HOWEVER. FINALLY HE DESISTED AND SURRENDERED
/TO DESPAIR. HIS LIFE"S WORK WAS TREASURED AND EXHIBITED
/BY MANY AS AN OBJECT OF RIDICULE.
/  THE BROKEN-HEARTED SCIENTIST FELL ILL UNDER THE STRAIN
/AND DIED SHORTLY AFTERWARD, WITH THE LAUGHTER OF THE
/SCIENTIFIC WORLD RINGING IN HIS EARS.
/  EVEN AFTER BERINGER"S DEATH THERE WAS NO END TO THE
/TRAGIC JOKE. A BOOKSELLER, ONE HOBHARD OF HAMBURG, SEEING
/AN OPPORTUNITY TO MAKE CAPITAL OUT OF BERINGER"S MIS-
/FORTUNES, BOUGHT UP ALL AVAILABLE COPIES AND NOT ONLY
/REISSUED THEM, BUT COMPILED A SECOND EDITION WHICH
/ACHIEVED A LARGE CIRCULATION!



Feel free to contact me, David Gesswein djg@pdp8online.com with any questions, comments on the web site, or if you have related equipment, documentation, software etc. you are willing to part with.  I am interested in anything PDP-8 related, computers, peripherals used with them, DEC or third party, or documentation. 

PDP-8 Home Page   PDP-8 Site Map   PDP-8 Site Search